I fear the day when people call their pets names like "RISCie". --Suso
I don't think that the deep end is deep enough for me. --Suso
Nobody says "send a self addressed stamped envelope" anymore.  It's all DOTCOM! --Suso
The choices you make, whether good or bad,  make you more of who you are and less of who you could be. --Suso
This signature was generated with "randomsig v1.10.0"
Kids are ok until they think that they know something. That's when we call them adults. --Suso
Any thing that is successful in this world has both good and bad in it. --Suso
People are predictable.  It's when they are unpredictable that we become amused or annoyed. --Suso
while trying to perl -d this problem the perl debugger segfaults. :-(
The truth is usually just an excuse for lack of imagination. -- Stan M. Gerbig
This party has been quite an inspiration for pic-a-sig quotes. -- Andrew Stoeckley
A computer without Microsoft is like ice cream without ketchup. 
Standards are apparently for wussy boys like us. Real men do whatever the hell they want and then get all ALL CAPS on us when people complain. -- Chris Dent
If you transpose the three letters in HAL you get IBM.
So many great random lines.  So few emails.
If it's not working, it's breaking. -- Joe Bowman
You realize that by the time you restore /boot from tape, you could have rebuilt a kernel ? -- Jeremy Fischer
"Every program attempts to expand until it can read mail. Those programs which cannot so expand are replaced by ones which can." -- jwz
"Hey, you can't do that because security is more important than your convenience." -- Jeremy Fischer
Give me the root password, and I'll rm -fr / the world.
If it can be told what you can see or read, then it follows that you can be told what to say or think. -- Boards of Canada
I'm not the stick, but I play one on TV. -jeremy
Think of Linux security as a sort of "wedding cake". The two figures at the top are the root account.
I eat where I want to eat, not because I've been given a discount there. --Suso
http://suso.suso.org/programs/randomsig/
How come the answers to my technical questions are always written in another language? --Suso
Let your SNMP client do the walking.
You can't be a good System Administrator unless you have strong opinions. --Suso
Man's biggest mistake was the <BLINK> tag.
Nessecity is the best invention.
BUGS: Cdrecord has even more options than ls.  -cdrecord man page.
A bus station is where a bus stops.\nA train station is where train stops.\nOn my desk, I have a work station...
Money isn't worth anything at all until you buy something with it. --Suso
Sometimes some really good random signature lines get cut off at eighty characte
There have to be limits.
Sure it's something you could do Joe, you'd just have to use some root expliots as part of the process.
The only people making money from spamming are the people writing the spamming software they sell to stupid spammers. -- Adrian Hosey
It doesn't help if when you drop your arms down they interfere with mr. piece of crap chair.
Complicated == Learning Experience  -- Joe Bowman
If you search the Web for the phrase "under construction", you'd find every home page, and then some. -- Randal L. Schwartz
Was I before Chuang Tzu who dreamt about being a butterfly, or am I now a butterfly who dreams about being Chuang Tzu?  -- Chuang Tzu
"Below The Root" has nothing to do with the Unix security model.
Don't trust any sysadmin who has a joystick on their desk. --Suso
Does that require a saving throw?
Without headers, anything is possible. --Suso
Suso: Do you know how to fork?\nJeremy: Isn't that a little personal?
If stupidity got us into this mess, why can't it get us out?
Ahh. The joy of Windows. Second only to the joy of getting kicked square in the biscuits. -- Jeremy Fischer
If windows is the answer, it must have been a stupid question.
Was it worth it? Yes.\nWould I do it again? No.\n-- Ken Thompson
I always !tail on purpose.
Two wrongs really don't make a right.  But 3 rights make a left.
You're running me on a live system.  That's incredibly stupid.\n  -- RedHat Alpha installer.
Emacs:\nAdvantages:\n -Very extensive\n -Inexpensive.\nDisadvantages:\n -Takes about a day to learn to use.\n -Takes about a week to learn to use well.\n -Takes about six month to learn to use efficiently.\n -Takes about a lifetime to learn the feautures.
If you don't like your current mail reader, try mutt. http://www.mutt.org/
It took the power of 3 Commodore 64's to go to the moon, but it takes a 3GHz Pentium 4 with 1GB of RAM to run Windows...
This isn't the planet I signed up for. -- Rebecca Herald
It's better to be king among kings than king among pawns. -- Marina Kim
In the time you spent complaining, you could have done something about it.
Don't be the Linus Torvalds of today, instead prepare for being the Linus Torvalds of tommorow.
Don't be discouraged that a good attitude doesn't make the world a better place. You'll just have to have try having attitude 6 billion times greater.
Now you can type "make install" to build Tulpas\n(or press that green button to restart universe).
It's never too late to kick someone's ass. -- Karen Knight
Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in the house.
Hmmm. If you make donut holes when you make donuts, I wonder if you get server holes when you make servers... -- Joe Bowman
I would crush my own eyeballs with a crimper before I volunteered to work on a project with C++. -- Adrian Hosey
This is the Unix philosophy:\nWrite programs that do one thing and do it well.\nWrite programs to work together.\nWrite programs to handle text streams, because that is a universal interface. -Doug MacIlroy
Distrust all claims for "one true way".  -- Eric S. Raymond
The easiest programs to use are those that leverage the user's pre-existing knowledge most effectively. -- Eric S. Raymond
It's amazing how much you can sell (what essentially is) a variable resistor for these days. --Suso
Don't have a great day, make it a great day.
200 years ago those same people who spent 40 hours a week in front of the TV, spent 40 hours a week in front of the fire. -- David Brin
Just because my vocabulary isn't as high, doesn't mean that I can't post a challenging response to your message.
About 450 million computers exist in the world.  That means that 5.5 billion people still haven't choosen their operating system. -- John "Maddog" Hall
Marketing is the art of making something seem better than it actually is. --Suso
If you can think of it, it exists somewhere. -- David Byrne
Time to re-order more signatures from Randomsig(tm).
Thank you for sharing your amazing program, ran it up on my linux box and it smacked me in the face like halibut handled by a jealous fishwife! -- Some guy
Joe: SYN\nSuso: ACK\nJoe: FIN\n
I keep wasting good randomsigs on e-mails that I end up canceling.
Hi! I'm a .signature virus! Copy me into your ~/.signature to help me spread!
Everything is vulnerable to something. -- Jeremy Fischer
Computers and programs do the work for us, not the other way around. --Suso
Monday isn't worse than the other days.  It is just that it isn't any better and it is the first one. -- Oliver Boch
Sometimes broken calculators can be fixed by reinserting the batteries properly.  -From a calculus book.
I think that a supernova is more predictable than people leaving a resturant. -- Marina Kim
/*******************************************************\n * Program -- Solve it -- Solves the worlds problems.  *\n *     All of them. At once.  This will be a great     *\n *  program when I finish it.                          *\n *******************************************************/\n --Steve Oualline
Emacs is a nice OS - but it lacks a good text editor. That's why I am using Vim. --Anonymous
Don't just surf the web, make waves with suso.org.
If we are going to be a throw away society, then we shouldn't create toxic things. --Suso
Are kids little adults or are adults big kids? --Suso
Any thing that is successful in this world has both good and bad in it. --Suso
Millions of beautiful things in this world, yet only two eyes to see them with. --Suso
People are predictable.  It's when they are unpredictable that we become amused or annoyed. --Suso
One who plays catch up, will always be catching up. Be there now instead. --Suso
If it weren't for bad data, we wouldn't have any data at all. -- Mark Wilcox
while trying to perl -d this problem the perl debugger segfaults. :-(
The truth is usually just an excuse for lack of imagination. -- sgerbig
5 years won't be a long time to wait 4 years 11 months and 30 days from now. --Suso
You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation. -Plato
perl -e "print pack 'H*','7375736f407375736f2e6f7267 '"
The changes happening in your world are someone else's dreams taking fold. --Suso
It's far better to make money from having a good life than it is to have a good life from making money. --Suso
Even Philip Glass had to drive a cab. --Suso
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. -- Hector Berlioz
Life is our own movie. --Suso
Paying attention is cheap. --Suso
Time was invented so everything wouldn't happen at once.
It is unfortunate that we see successful people's mistakes more than the those of failures. --Suso
When you prohibit people from exercising their own self control, they will show none. --Suso
People tell things to search engines that they would never talk about publicly. --Suso
You are only as old as you are wise. --Suso
Anyone who thinks they know everything, knows nothing.
Don't let anyone tell you how to mow your lawn. --Suso
"It's enough to make one leave applications programming and go into graphics......"\n  --James Blasius(In a newsgroup review of "Tron" in 1982)
When I was 15, a classmate kicked me off his BBS because he didn't like my email signatures.  Now look at me, I wrote the freaking program! --Suso
Work really smartly and work hardly. --Suso
If my life followed someone else's then it wouldn't really be my life. --Suso
Every day is a cloudy day on Jupiter. --APOTD
forward error - strawberry unknown domain
Linux makes me hungry. -- Marina
Linux: be root. - Windows: reboot.
You have the power to make yourself happy.  Just smile for a while. --Suso
Next time someone cuts you off, just wave at them.  Let them know that you are a person too. --Suso
Hi you've reached the offices of Skullbocks, Tim and Larry are out right now so leave us a message so that we can call you back while you're out and leave you one.
A bad workman always blames his tools.  That's why I don't use Windows. --Suso
It's difficult not to be negative about things, but it's important not to be.  One's reputation is quickly tarnished. --Scott Kellogg
I can't tell whether you're using Emacs or playing Tetris. --Suso
Windows is like Diet Coke, why would I want to get used to the taste when I know it sucks. --Suso
With every big success comes a little failure.\nWith every big failure comes a little success. --Suso
I am not an earthling or a martian,\nbut a conscience entity of the multi-dimensional space time continuum. --Suso
You can affect the minds of webmasters and sysadmins by typing in a message after the hostname/ part in a url and hitting reload several times on the resulting 404 page. --Suso
Software patents are not a family value. --Suso
<Frankablu/#linux> My kitchen is on fire. Is there a command I can type as root to get rid of it?
Does your taco break apart when you bite into it?
We secretly switched this IT worker's Friday, with a Monday. Let's see what happens.
Why do most people have zero tolerance for problems in Linux,\nbut tolerate endless problems in Windows? --Suso
WARNING: RAID-6 is currently highly experimental.  If you use it, there is no guarantee whatsoever that it won't destroy your data, eat your disk drives, insult your mother, or re-appoint George W. Bush.  --Linux kernel help message
People in cars cause accidents....accidents in cars cause people :-D -- pixelpusher220
Germans aim to innovate more than others.\nAmericans aim to sue people to make them innovate less. --Suso
At least most scientists will abandon old theories in light of new truths. --Suso
To make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe. -- Carl Sagan
EMACS = Escape, Meta, Alt, Control, Shift
EMACS = Eight Megabytes And Constantly Swapping
They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. Thats nothing, cause if you play it forwards, it installs Windows.
It's funny,  those who don't know how to help are eager, and those who could help just dont want to. --Jackie Miller
Bush and his bushites really test the limits of my pacifistiveness. --Suso
What is the use of doing something if you don't understand it. --Suso\n(See STTNG episode "When the Bough Breaks")
Look ppl, (a little MS bashing coming) try to remember that this is Linux, not MS. It's not FIXED unless your box runs for DAYS without crashing, in X, under load, with a 3D screensaver running, while compiling Openoffice and taking out the trash. -- riverty (on Gentoo forums)
echo $HOME gives /usr/sbin and this has following permissions: drwxr-xr-x but who is going to argue with an error message. -- Michael Einem
You may think you are an expert, but then you login to irc.freenode.net and find out how much you really know. ;-)
Linux users are binary.  We work in pairs and even though the one who asks the question also knows the answer, they need someone else to answer it for them. --Suso
Trucker 1: Breaker one niner are there any smokies with ears on?\nTrucker 2: If you wanna smokey good buddy try channel 9.
PUBLIC SPLIT ON WHETHER BUSH IS A DIVIDER -CNN scrolling banner, 10/15/2004
I wonder when Michael Moore realized he had entertainment value. --Suso
Passwords are like antibiotics--they're overused and mostly worthless. -- maximilln
Suso's md5sum Challenge:  Create two files, each file contains the md5sum string of the other file.
The only thing that changes in life is the technology. --Suso
The day Microsoft makes a product that doesn't suck is the day they make a vacuum cleaner.
I like strawberries better than Outlook Extress. -- Marina Kim
Please reboot your computer, or better yet, shut it off and go home. -- Marina Kim
'When you stumble a lot you tend to look at your feet. Now we have to make people lift their eyes back to the horizon and see the line of ancestors behind us saying, "Make my life have meaning," and to our inheritors before us saying, "create the world we will live in."' -- John Sheridan
Government is a good idea. But put too many people in it and it's easier and easier to hide corruption and greed.\n\nCities are a good idea. Put too many people in them and unions can hold the city hostage, people don't feel they have any say and the city goes to shit.\n\nUniversity is a good idea. Put too many people in it and it becomes a cult where the next employers can ask for bachelor degrees for wiping floors, because they have one.\n\nToo many people.  --Suso
And there's the idiot who praises\nwith enthusiastic tones\nAll centuries but this\nAnd every country but his own.\n -- The Mikado (G & S)
Announcer: We're here at the Vigneswara Call Processing Center in Bangalore, India, where we've secretly replaced the customer service reps' Windows XP with Linux. Let's listen in.\nOperator: Wow! That went completely smoothly.\nAnnouncer: Did you know we replaced your Windows with Linux?\nOperator: Impossible! Where's the bitter CLI taste?\nAnnouncer (tapping the keyboard a few times): Right here!\nOperator: Amazing! Can I work a third consecutive shift please?\nSupervisor (shocked): they never ask for a third shift with Windows! -hey!(33014)
Climbing skyscrapers with bare hands seemed impossible to me, but I have realized that The Impossible remains until you make it possible -- Alain Robert
Modern people are only willing to believe in their computers, while I believe in myself. -- Alain Robert
Rotten wood cannot be carved. -- Confucius
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE:  I could care less who you show this email to, what you do with it or whether you break any laws by doing so.  Your life is your own responsibility and I'm not going to stop you.
Let's go googling, for the knowledge of everything... including the price.
Perception is reality.
"When the game is over, the king and the pawn go into the same box." -- Italian Proverb
The worst kind of hell is not knowing when you're in it. --Suso
When I wasn't sure what the word charisma meant, I met Steve Jobs and then I knew. --Larry Tesler
Anarchy only works when there are leaders. --Suso
Beware of anyone who says they have a quick question.\nIt will never be quick. --Suso
Learn to let things go. --Suso
Running a Windows enterprise was like working in the emergency room of Cook County Memorial. Working on Linux was like being a Maytag repair man.
Does any language really need that many parentheses. -- Andrew Dingman (refering to Lisp)
I'd rather plant a tree than run on a Sun. -- Suso
There is a whole lot of SYNing going on on the Internet. -- Suso
Perl is hard for one little part of the program and easy for the rest\nC/Java/Python/etc.. is easy for one little part of the program and hard for the rest. --Suso
You cannot keep everyone organized, except by law.  And even then its difficult. -- Suso (refering to the DNS TLD system)
Dell Blade Plug-ins(TM) make your whole server room smell fresh and new. -- Suso
A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"\n The survey was a huge failure...\n In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.\n In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.\n In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.\n In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.\n In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.\n In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.\n And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant
The moving walkway is now ending, please look down.
Everyday is an exciting day on a Windows OS.
Imagine that your tongue is the inside of a powdered doughnut.\n  -- Guy from Big Red talking about wine.
Wadler: User mistakes are what computers are for.\nDingalinger: Not doing our business is what computers are for.\n (Parody of Tron)
If I was an Intel Xeon 3.8GHz processor, I'd enjoy a good blow job.
Place a frog in a pan of cold water. He doesn't hop out.\nPlace a frog in a pan of boiling hot water. He immeadiately hops out.\nPlace a frog in a pan of cold water, and slowly raise the temperature to boiling. He remains in the pan until being boiled to death.\n\nPlace a person in a peaceful, law-abiding (gov. & civilian) society. He doesn't speak out.\nPlace a person in a totalitarian nightmare. He fights back.\nPlace a person in a law-abiding society and slowly remove his civil rights bit by bit. He doesn't fight back because "it doesn't affect me" until he is living in a totalitarian nightmare with no rights and no one to back him up.
I don't know why I put "Bridge of Death" there. -- Bob Piercy
Jonathan Schwartz: Scott McNealy created millions of network computing jobs.\nRichard Dick Head (803293): Sweet! Maybe I'll move to India to get one!
Cumbersome rhymes grow like weeds on my lip. -- Mythril Nazgul
$self =~ s/brain/pudding/;
Phil: Somebody asked me today, "Phil, if you could be anywhere in the world, where would you like to be?" And I said to him, "Prob'ly right here - Elko, Nevada, our nation's high at 79 today." Out in California, they're gonna have some warm weather tomorrow, gang wars, and some *very* overpriced real estate. Up in the Pacific Northwest, as you can see, they're gonna have some very, very tall trees.
Even cake has some odd ingredients. -- Chris Eller
What a great domain name:  diechristians.de
I like to waste my jokes on the accuracy nazis on slashdot.org
Don't make the mistake of telling an open source developer that something is impossible.  They will find a way to make it work.
You can't milk a cow with your hands in your pants.